Mother:
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Ideally, you felt nurtured and cared for by your mother.
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Ideally, at the proper time, your mother gave you your life and blessed you, relinquishing her claim on you as “mine.”
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The Mother Wound:
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Your mother was absent (through death, abandonment, mental illness, neglect).
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Your mother was overly present (helicopter parenting, relying on you to be “the man of the house” or meet her emotional needs.)
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Your mother didn’t or won’t release you (she is overly involved with her opinion, you may be overly reliant on her approval, you often feel guilty).
Part of the foundational work is understanding that you must take responsibility for your wounded parts, and must learn to be a good mother to yourself.
Father:
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Ideally, your father provided structure and order and you learned how to be in the world.
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Ideally, at the proper time, your father gave you his blessing, warned you about the dragon, and sent you into the world to slay it.
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Ideally, you learned how to be a King, Warrior, Magician and Lover from your father.
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Father Wound:
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Abandonment-the absence of his physical presence
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Abdication-the absence of his leadership and/or guidance
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Abuse-the absence of lovingkindness, mercy, justice
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Part of the foundational work is understanding that you must take responsibility for your wounded parts, and must learn to be a good father to yourself.
Healing, establishing boundaries, allowing yourself to see. Even if you had/have a great mother and/or father, sometimes adjustments can Or need to be made to create balance.
Image: Unsplash/Gemma Evans